Tales from the hardside
19/03/03 And lo it came to pass, all of a sudden everything got well sweet. First the palpitating (and for the band, slightly daunting) news that The Soundhouse has accepted us as one of the 12 bands taking part in their "Stars In Their Eyes" competition, with £250 the incentive for entering, in which we will be adopting the glammed-up rock legend persona of Kiss. There is no set date for our heat yet, but it will almost certainly be in June. This gives our motley crew (or even crue) just 3 months to get our act the fuck together, but it also gives us a target to work towards. The personnel problem has still not disappeared, but for this we will likely be employing the services of ex-EFD drum god Matt de Kersaint Giraudeau IV (as he is known in the provinces of Languedoc-Rousillon) unless we find a drummer by then. Also, the band has considered putting Tom Possessed back on the drums and giving lumbering giant Leo de Wolf a trial on vocals. But the best news of the week has to be that finally the Dark Shadow, the Black Warrior, the Bitch itself Jim's guitar is fully functional once more. And if that's not a reason to thrash till the Sun turns black I don't know what is. Meanwhile, work on the site continues. More news soon, dildollatrons...
04/02/03 As unbelievable as it may at first sound, on Sunday Dead Corpse finally rehearsed for the first time in over a year. All four current members were present, and it goes without saying that it was totally killer. To start with the old cover songs were trotted out to warm up and Bryan had a go at playing drums to them, but it soon became apparent that a more productive use of our time would be to put Bryan on his natural instrument of Cybernecronic Guitaratron and shove Tom back on to the Drums of War temporarily, so that we could write some original material. We half-wrote two songs, one untitled, one called "Open Fire," and both ruling with a harsh, spiky iron fist of deranged subhuman lunacy. However, the rehearsal again exposed the need for a proper bo selecta drummer, with the skills and the equipment to help us achieve our vision of one day recording a track with Justin Timberlake. Per chance entitled "I just wanna fuck you to death with a meat hook baby. Yeah yeah yeah." Harsh. Also of note, as you may have noticed, the website's undergoing another image overhaul, harking back to the black of the old days but with a classier finish. I hope you appreciate the buttons that change colour cos they took fuckin' ages to do.
22/01/03 So, the first update of 2003 (happy new year etc.), and over a year now since our first and only gig. Since then we have had a staggering 1 (one) rehearsals, so obviously our new year's resolution has to be to practice more if we want to achieve our ambition of getting a UK top 10 single and an appearance on Top Of The Pops. Ahem. The latest date set for rehearsal is February 2, although anyone who knows us will know that any date is very much temporary up until the very last minute. Hopefully though this year will be the year of the Corpse, so to speak, and Colcestrians will once again quake in fear as we fire gargantuan rays of sonic disruption into their fragile brains with our devastatingly apocalyptic instruments of apocryphal strife. Also of note, Tom and Bryan's side project with ex-EFD Feds Matt and Joe, Inbred, is gaining momentum, perhaps serving as both an example and a warning to Dead Corpse. As Ronnie James Dio once said, "Holy diver, you've been down too long in the midnight sea." Quite.
2003 News
2002 News
2001 News |
Cryptic Writings
 Inhumatus speaks I was watching the film 'The Sixth Sense' just now and I realised that it's a really cool film.
The scene with the 70's hippy boy who's blown the back of his head off with a gun is cool. So
is the bit with the hanging people who are looking at you. Its not very scary though. It'd be
cooler if instead of the dead folk wanting help, they only wanted to wreak revenge on the world
for living shitty lives. They could use the boy as their messenger in the world of the living
and he'd have to go and kill as many people as he could, sparing only the evil. Then the ground
could open up and a huge caco-demon could raise from the ground and torture the earth. The sky would
be blood red and flaming rocks would rain down on the mortals, apart from those who surrendered their
soul to satan and praised him. Churches would be burned down or turned into centres of worship to the
devil. And none of this Arnold Schwarzenegger rubbish, life would be led under Satan's rule and so called
religious heroes would be crushed. I'd keep the twist at the end though.
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